Monday, May 20, 2013

Deja Vu

I haven't seen my dad since 2009 when I visited him in Tehran. M hasn't seen him since 2004 and the hubby has never met him since we got married 9 years ago. Yes, this October it will be 9 years of marriage!

How we met, the proposal and the day we got married, will be three different blog posts of their own if not more :)

Anyways, I really hope that I am not jinxing my dad's visit. But, after all these years, HE IS COMING! I have been in America since 2001 and my dad has not seen where I live, how I live or with whom I live :(

I titled this entry 'Deja Vu' because I very vividly remember the day M (my bother) was coming to America. My life had no meaning without him in it and the only way that I was able to survive being away from him and away from my family and Homeland was because of MY wonderful hubby. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't have survived anything without him.

Yes, we argue and we have our moments, but WHO DOESN'T? At least we are still married and love each other....haha!

I am getting the same feelings with my dad coming as I did when M was coming. I cannot wait to see him and hug and hold him. I feel like he is a far away dream. I cannot believe that this is happening.
I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason! Even though I was crying my eyes out the other day just with the thought of having to let go only after 27 days of seeing him. I still tear up and I do not know how to handle it!

I have always had that guilt that I am in a better place than many other people. I have never really been able to deal with good byes either and being away from loved ones. So it makes me really sad. The only way that I have been able to deal with it is by ignoring my feelings and putting them aside. Because if I don't, I'll suffocate from all the emotions. I have never actually said that aloud before.

Thus the reason why I wanted to start a blog. I not only want to share my feelings, emotions and thoughts, but I also want to meet other people that can help me and vice versa! Hope this is a good start :D